Mr Whippy

So The Following has recently shown me the danger of putting people in boxes. Well to be fair, paralysing them, dyslocating all their joints and then folding them up and putting them in boxes.

And our community does like it’s boxes, dosn’t it?

Now you are probably assuming that i’m going to tackle some of the weighty recent issues that have cropped up, other than the exessive use of the word gate without any hotels involved, I don’t think anything I’m going to say here is going to help or is appropriate. Want my opinion, buy me a beer and talk to me face to face.

No, i’m going to grab someone and stuff them in a box, possibly while removing bones at the same time.

You see recently I read a post that read:

‘I have never seen a Larp combat tourney which wasn’t won by the whippiest fighter with the least shame.’

Now if this was from someone who constantly moans and wasn’t echoed by others I wouldn’t have paid much intrest cause internet. However it did resonate and not just in regards to tourneys.

Now I have been in tourneys where the shame of tappy whippy fighting would actually kill you (people give you ‘that look’ at Eyelarp or Oddessy where the entire player base is watching you so you know they will be talking about how shit you are later. I mean they do, seriously, all the players go off into a special room and say ‘My god did you see how shit x was….’ with diagrams and little sacrafices to the gods of hate and bitterness, but hey if your x you probably don’t care do you , cause the second component is a lack of shame. I joke of course…there are no gods of hatred and bitterness.

The problem is fights are zero sum situations. You win or lose. In some cases you lose out on a snacky thing in others you lose your character. Weirdly you could also lose out on the bragging rights to being the whippiest fighter in the west, which has to be weird thought process. There is very little to make people want to ‘fight cool’ over ‘fighting to win’ other than being elitest larp cocks.

Unfortuantly the use of metal boxes and limb dyslocation to encourage people to rp hit and solid sword swings is apprently illegal and madey-uppy so it’s not a solution. Although Se7en has shown me there are multiple box related solutions, boxing Helana however I am stay the fuck away from. So where do we go with this?

So whats the cause? Well i belive, in my humble opinion, the following:

  1. No ones showed you.
  2. To bloody competative and having no shame.
  3. The fear of charater loss.
  4. The idea that we must win.
  5. Adrenaline.

The thing is adrenaline and fear can usually end in people fighting unsafe. That’s down to people knowing their own bodies and managing themselves. That comes with experince and time. Getting someone to show you can be embaressing, and i reckon people should offer training if they want better fights. Fighting should be as asperational as kit and characterisation, but hitting that asperation is difficult if you don’t know how. It’s the other two that are the problem and they boil down to winning at all costs.

Now I don’t know any system that does not expect good solid fighting or promotes fast, short swings. Most systems thease days expect a one hit a second and say explicitly that all blows must be properley roleplayed. This is usually in the same breath as talking about how many hits you can take and roleplaying getting hurt. (Or as the rules of larp put it ‘Getting hit hurts, roleplay it.’).

Now in my mind if you are not putting out good, solid, roleplayed blows you are cheating. No bear with me. You are getting an advantage over another player who is following the rules.

Oh and if you are offended by that can we not call it Whippygate? I’d like something more British like ‘Whippypremierinn’ or maybe ‘Holidaywhip’, actually on second thoughts maybe not the latter.

So how do we counter this kind of thing? Well its hard to tell the people who need confidence and experince form the other people (well not that hard, the latter are generally discussed in darkened corners with the kind of hate reserved for Fox network news.) so you cannot just shout ‘You are everything wrong with society and you will cause the crash of civilisation at them’…..apprently.

So I propose a two fold approach. Elitest larper twats should step forwards and rather than sneer, we should say ‘hey, do you want to spar for a bit?’ and maybe learn a few things to people who want to learn, but are put off by the elitest attitude of dickheads like me. Oh and the second one? Well a combo of refs saying ‘Hey, i can see how your fighting could you make those blows less tappy’ and ‘Excuse me have you considered not being a wanker?’ to known offenders.

Of course this is all my opinion and i’m guilty of fighting shit sometimes. But you know what? That’s ok, cause actually I got picked up on it recently. I’m currently carrying a bust wrist and my swings were….well as the ref called it ‘Fucking shit and you should know better.’ And it was fair. My blows were shit and the tip of my sword was moving about a foot, but even worse i was swinging the blade back up as if it was made of….well a bit of rubber.

Fair enough the ref is a very good friend of mine, and a twat, so he had the confidence to pick me up on it. However whatever the reason i was effectivly cheating. What did I do? Well hardened the fuck up, took it in the spirit it was ment and switched to a dagger to put less preassure on my wrist. Oh and I said sorry, cause I was in the wrong and an adult.

Now I’m not saying I’m a saint or the best at larp, but what I am saying is the attitude to being picked up on shit fighting should be ‘hey i’m in the wrong, i’ll fix it’ rather than getting a snit on. If it’s accidental you fix it, if you did it on purpose, well you got caught take some personal responsibility for your life and maybe take some time for self reflection.

Now I just need to get someone to make me some boxes.

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